Thursday, July 16, 2009


The IV was started, and everyone was smiling and assuring me that everything was going to be alright. As my face started to tingle and flush from the Diprovan that was being flushed into my central nervous system, the flashback started to take hold. At first it was hazy and distant but as the full force of Michal Jackson's insomnia drug hit me the terror began.

That crisp fall evening in a West Texas cotton field. My trusty Criterion Dynascope and assorted lenses on the table beside me. A Coleman stove with hot water going for cocoa , Swiss Miss with marshmallows. I remember it like it was yesterday.

The blinding light and my body paralyzed as I was lifted towards the craft. It was hovering a few hundred feet above the ground. There was no sound, no real sensation at all except the realization that I was unable to move a single muscle in my body. I do not know how I was even able to breathe. That thought only crossed my mind later under hypnosis.

The cold metal slab was about 7 feet long and seemed to just float in the air about waist height of my captors. My eyelids were being held open and I remember my eyes feeling like they where dry and chapped. Small wires and tubes were attached to my body in various places but I couldn’t see any machines or instruments that they were connected to. There was no sound, no walls I could see in this seemingly endless room.

I tremble at the thought and my veins seem to fill with ice water when I am forced to think of the long and shiny probe they implanted inside me. What was it for? Was it going to be harmful to me? Did they do sexual things to me? If so, why didn’t it feel good? And for God’s sake are they going to take it out? How would I ever pass through an airport metal detector again?

I awoke cold and naked laying in the fetal position about five yards away from my telescope. Aside from the lack of clothing and my location everything was fine. Oh and the painful feeling of my abdomen being full. I just attributed that to the huge platter of pulled pork I had for dinner at Stubb’s that evening.

I have never had a problem getting on a plane and this has never happened to me since that terrible night.

In all fairness to my doctor and the wonderful team at Raulerson hospital who performed my colonoscopy yesterday. It wasn’t his, or their, fault. The procedure went well. It was quick and painless.

Just the thought that I had another anal probe, and this time from a Yankee’s Fan is all most to much to handle.

The Horror, The Horror of it all………..