Sunday, November 29, 2009

Cyber-Monday? Are You Kidding Me?

I’m watching Fox News and they are talking about how great this years “Cyber-Monday” is going to be. How excited they are that we will spend millions of dollars on line tomorrow. And the bargains we will get! Think of all the money we will save on all that shit we don’t need!

Are you kidding me?

When you bought something on the internet this year how did you pay for it? You just dropped some cash from your wallet into the scanner next to your computer and fired it off right?


You put it on your credit card. That’s right, your credit card.

Unemployment is now over 10% and the nations economy is in the tank. We are looking at a 12 trillion national debt and darker economic times than the Great Depression brought us.

But not you. You are so well off these days that you can put that new Playstation on your credit card at some God awful interest rate. Kid screaming for a new bicycle or maybe a brand new laptop? Not a problem. Whip out that plastic baby! It’s the American way. UPS will have it at your door in a week, (if they decide to deliver it at all).

And when the bills come in or get to be too big for you to handle just pick up the phone and call some asshole lawyer and declare bankruptcy. Or maybe even one of those sleezebag lawyers who run a clinic to get you out of IRS problems.

Here’s an idea for your debt problems in this Brave New America. Just claim that someone stole your identity. Simple, easy and best of all you are trendy and chic. Just think of how cool your friends will think you are. Be the first on your block!

OK dumbass, Time to wake up and face reality.

If you want shop on the internet this “Cyber-Monday” go ahead and do it. Just use a debit card. That way you can only spend as much money as you have. What a concept, spending only as much as you can afford.

And make sure you get a Playstation 3, or a new Fujitsu laptop please. This way when you have to sell it all to me for less than half price to cover your electric bill I can have the ones I want.

And can afford.......