Wednesday, December 17, 2014

HackySac Pee Pee Whack...

It’s the holiday season again. Everyone is out spending tons of money they can’t afford on presents that no one want’s or needs.

I love it! I really do!

My new favorite items are the ultra cheap laptop computers that are showing up on line and in the big box moron traps like Sprawl-Mart, Breast Buy and Target.

It seems like only yesterday when Sony, one of the worlds largest and most powerful technology companies, was hacked by cyber terrorists. Wait a minute, it WAS yesterday! Their email systems, payroll and super secure corporate secrets were all compromised by computer hackers. The Home Depot was hit this year. So was Target. All of a sudden your credit cards and banking information may be out there for sale to the highest bidder. The IRS was hacked last year also. That ought to make you feel warm and fuzzy as well.

Just imagine that the huge and all powerful unregulated IRS who handles your taxes, and now your medical records thanks to Obamacare, was hacked and who knows where that information has gone. There are even companies springing up with million dollar guarantees that they can protect you from credit card fraud and identity theft.


Their fine print says they will spend up to a million dollars to attempt to help you get your funds back. The truth is, NO BODY can protect you from the threat of hackers getting your vital and private information. Unless of course you live in the woods and eat roots and berries and never interact with modern civilization again.

Which leads me to today’s rant.

The new rage this Christmas is the ultra cheap laptops. For under 200 bucks you can pick up one of these pseudo computers and be on line computing in minutes. Why so cheap? It’s pretty simple really. They have very little RAM and they don’t have a hard drive. All of your programs and data are stored on the “Cloud”. The “Cloud” is a large computer storage server sitting somewhere out in cyberspace and it makes your shit available to you wherever and whenever you need it. You don’t even need a telephone line or cable connection. They work off of a cellular signal that is built into the computer’s terminal.  You pay for this monthly, on line of course.

So think about this for a minute. You now have a device that can do all your computing and store all of your personal data, bank accounts, email addresses, electronic shopping and bill paying and also your tax and health records, somewhere that is not in your control.

My financial information is on a second drive on this computer that sometimes I can’t even get into because I forget the password or even to plug it in. When it’s unplugged no one on the planet can get into my data. Do you really want to save a couple hundred bucks on a laptop that almost guarantees you will become a victim of identity theft or worse? Is this a great country or what?

Happy Holidays Everyone!

Monday, October 27, 2014

Quarantine Stupidity…

With the recent and deadly outbreak of Ebola Zaire in Western Africa a few tough questions need to be asked. If you didn’t think I had the stones to ask them, I guess you haven’t read any other posts in my blog yet!

Ebola is a pretty wicked disease. Kudos to those who volunteer their time and skills to go to the front lines and do battle with this horrible killer. They are doing truly heroic work there.

Why should that stop when they fly home? Have they lost part of their reasoning power to this disease or experience. Are they so anxious to show the good work they have done that their vanity and craving of the limelight eclipse all their training and knowledge?

When you come back from an Ebola afflicted area, when you have been working with infected patients who contract a disease with a 50% mortality rate, do you not expect to be quarantined?

How fucking stupid can you be?

Recently a nurse came back from the “Hot Zone” and had her temperature taken upon hitting US soil. Ebola is a “Hemorrhagic Fever”. The first sign someone has been infected, at this point in the evolution of the disease, is an elevated temperature. Hers was elevated. The state of New Jersey put her into a hastily constructed isolation area. As far as we know, if no symptoms appear within a 21 day window starting the last day one is exposed to the infection, you don’t have the disease. Healthcare workers in the “Hot Zone” know this more than anyone else on the planet. This nurse felt her rights were being violated and she has threatened legal action against the state and federal government. Her fever has since abated and she was released. She has been allowed to go home to Maine.

How does that make you Maniacs feel now? This selfish hero could be walking around your home town and possibly be infecting all of you with this killer disease.

Since when does her volunteer service outside of the country trump anyone’s rights not to be infected? What has happened to the training and common sense that she is supposed to possess as a nurse? Doesn’t she realize the harm she is doing to the nursing profession as well as the damage she has caused in the response system of our governments?

Kaci, your perceived nobility that you gained for your heroic service went out the window when your actions threatened the safety of the populace.

Sit in the isolation tent for how ever long you need to. Were you in deluxe accommodations in West Africa? Put up with the inconvenience and come out of the situation with your head held high and possibly a book deal.

Don’t act like a spoiled, self centered, stuck up New England Bitch (or Dick, gender dependent).

This whole situation has caught our leaders with their pants down. Mistakes are, and will continue, to be made. We need to try and think our way out of this potential pandemic. It shouldn’t be that hard. Stop the incoming flights from the countries of Western Africa, Secure our borders. Quarantine potential victims for the required period of time and use some fucking common sense for once.

None of this will happen. Our government is infected with a far more dangerous and virulent disease.

It’s called the Mid-Term Election…..

Friday, September 19, 2014

Hopefully Not the 11th Song…

Well, tomorrow is the First Coast Heart Walk. The American Heart Association's world wide fund raiser. The idea is for people to come together and raise money and awareness to combat the effects of Cardiovascular Disease. Heart Attacks and Strokes kill over eight hundred thousand (800,000) Americans every year. Pretty serious numbers when you realize that’s over 15 times as many Americans as died in the entire Viet Nam war. One in four Americans will die from Heart Disease.

There is a 25% chance Heart Disease will kill you. Yes stupid, YOU reading this, YOU!

Depending on when you read this, Heart Disease will have or will be killing me. Yup. No more Chuckie.

I fought this fight as hard as I could. I have had a quadruple bypass, 14 heart caths, and 5 stents. I have easily spent a couple million dollars of my own, well mostly insurance company, money. I have even volunteered for clinical trials for experimental procedures in an attempt to help win this fight. Sure, if the Stem Cell clinical trial continues to show amazing results I will get to live a bit longer. But the real bonus is that the research may one day help you or one of your loved ones fight and maybe , just maybe, keep you from having to go the the pain and anguish that my beautiful wife and family have gone through. I’m not sure whether watching the intolerable pain I have put them through or the physical pain of the heart condition is worse. Both of them really suck.

Tomorrow, after the walk, I will be purging my friends list on Facebook. I was under the impression that Facebook friends were real friends.  19% of them donated to my cause. I guess I am just an analog fool in a digital age. I keep only a few friends and that list will now be culled drastically. I don’t have a lot of time left on this earth. Soon I will be sitting under The Tree, drinking from the Beer Volcano in Flying Spaghetti Monster Heaven. I surely don’t have time to spend on or with people who don’t care about me or are unwilling to come off of a couple bucks to help keep me alive much longer.

Only a few of us can perform open heart surgery. All of us can afford a few dollars to donate to save our or a loved ones life. Chances are you are reading this on a device that costs $500.00 or more utilizing a service that sets you back $50 to $100 a month.

So let me see if I understand this correctly, You have a $600.00 cell phone that costs you a grand a year to keep active so you can play angry birds and type stupid fucking text messages into, but you can’t come off of $20.00 to help defeat heart disease? And I don’t mean for me. This research could save your and your children’s lives.

Don’t ask me if I think that’s pretty stupid, You won’t like the answer.

If I survive tomorrow it will be because of two things, Cardiac Research and the love and support of my Wifey and true friends.

And if you didn’t care enough to cough up a couple bucks for this, my chosen cause, don’t insult me by crying fake bullshit tears when I am gone. You just flat out, didn’t give a shit about me anyway. The only person you will be fooling is yourself.

In fact, don’t come to my memorial service at all. Just stay home and jerk off with your expensive little smart phone or computer you shallow little prick.

Maybe you deserve the ticking time bomb in your chest after all.

Oh, The 11th song on the Doors 1967 album “The End”

Wednesday, September 3, 2014

The Cold Wet Facts…

The most recent storm to hit the internet is the “Ice Bucket Challenge” that is being done to support the ALS foundation.

ALS (Amyotrophic Lateral Sclerosis) is a terrible debilitating disease that is also known as Lou Gehrig’s Disease. It attacks the nerve cells and pathways in the brain and spinal cord. It’s an ugly thing to see let alone come down with.

According to ALSA, the official organization that raises money to fight this disease and support it’s victims, two people per one hundred thousand will contract this disease and die from it in America every year. The recent Ice Bucket Challenge craze on the internet was wildly successful. Millions of dollars were raised to combat this affliction. What you did was pour a bucket of ice water over your head and donate $10.00 to ALS. You then challenge your friends to do the same. If you don’t do the challenge in 24 hours you are supposed to send them $100.00. You video this tremendously selfless feat and upload it to the internet to shame your friends publicly into joining the movement. This internet phenomenon spread faster than Herpes at a week long rock concert. The sad part is most people don’t send in their $10.00. They just want to look good and have some fun with their friends

Saturday, 20 September 2014 I will be walking in the American Heart Association’s Heart Walk. I hope to raise some money for the AHA for combating and researching Heart Disease.

Why? You Ask?

Simple Answer. Heart Disease kills one in four Americans. Period. That means you have a 25% chance of dying from cardiovascular disease. Read it again, YOU HAVE A 25% CHANCE OF DYING OF HEART DISEASE. Everyone knows someone who has had a heart attack. I mean KNOWS someone. Facebook friends and twitter twats don’t count. YOU personally know someone who has died of cardiovascular disease.

Heart Disease kills 10 (ten) times as many WOMEN as Breast Cancer.

In the next 20 minutes 30 Americans will die from cardiovascular disease.

I am in no way belittling any other charity or organization here. One of my closest friends is in a fight for her life against Breast Cancer. Human female breasts are some of the most beautiful things ever invented. I even shaved my head to help support my dear friend, although I don't look as sexy bald as she does.

But I am dying of Heart Disease. My support and efforts are for this cause.

I haven’t been able to walk a hundred yards in one outing in over two years let alone a mile. Hopefully I will be able to do it now. I'm pretty sure I can.

I have been beyond fortunate with the care and love of my Wifey, my friends, physicians and nursing staff who have kept me alive for so long. (I refer to them all as "Team Chuckie"!)  The experimental Cardiac Stem Cell injections I received last June are truly the stuff of science fiction. Whoever would have thought that one day we would be able to stimulate the growth of new arteries on the heart muscle itself thus repairing damaged tissue from a heart attack? One day we may actually find a way to completely beat this curse that kills one quarter of Americans.

I hope I am alive to see that day.

But if I am not, I will go to Flying Spaghetti Monster Heaven knowing I did what I could to try and save your life. Yes, you reading this right now, YOUR LIFE.

You can donate to my favorite cause or sign up to walk with me at 

And you don’t even have to get wet!

Friday, August 1, 2014

Another final answer...

Why? I ask again and again.

With all the intellectual horsepower this country has floating around, why is it that only I can come up with intelligent answers for today's problems? I’m not that bright a guy. This makes me feel that our elected officials and high priced talent in government is not really worth what we are paying them.

A perfect example. The illegal immigrant problem along the southern US border. We are being milked to death trying to pay for all these illegal children streaming across the border. The feds and even local county governments are coming up short of cash trying to take care of these parasites.

The answer is beyond simple. Hell I thought of it. How difficult could it be?

Last years we gave:

Belize                   $28,300,000.00
Costa Rica            $38,000,000.00
El Salvador         $280,000,000.00
Guatemala          $391,800,000.00
Honduras            $624,000,000.00
Mexico               $958,200,000.00
Nicaragua           $695,000,000.00

Total                $3,015,000,000.00

For those of you challenged by zeros, that’s Three Billion Fifteen Million dollars.

Source is Wikipedia and

So you see, the cash is there already. We are giving it to these countries as foreign aid. Why don’t we just figure out a fair price per kid and just use it for these parasitic children here? You don’t think this would get the attention of all these mosquito infested cesspool countries who just line their leaders pockets with our charitable aid?

I would even go so far as implementing an economic embargo against Mexico as well as withholding foreign aid for their participation in the trafficking of these kids through their country to invade the United States. Sure we would piss off Carnival and Royal Caribbean for a while, but as soon as Mexico's tourist industry starts to feel the pinch the problem will be quickly solved.

Everyone wins, The states get reimbursed for the kids the feds are forcing on them, The government gets some cash for their work sheepherding these parasites, and it costs us nothing beyond what we are already spending.

Then our simpleton President gets to register more future Democratic voters when they make it to citizenship.

Whoda thunk it?

Friday, July 25, 2014

The Next Final Answer...

This time the final answer might cost us a little time and money.

Question:  Why are these children swarming the border of the southern United States?

Answer:  To get a better life and escape the horrendous living conditions in their own countries.

Pretty simple and straightforward. The United States has a higher standard of living than almost all of these third world cesspools that these kids are running away from. The shining light of freedom and charity is attracting them like moths to the flame. Our pathetic lack of an immigration policy that allows most anyone to lawyer their way into the US and stay here has caused the problem.

Just last night one of theses underprivileged kids who is in fear of his life was interviewed by a news reporter. The poor homeless kid in Central America pointed to a text message he received on his iPhone that detailed how to come to America and how to assure he would not be deported. I couldn’t believe it either. The kid had an iPhone! I don’t even have an iPhone! It seems the digital age is helping these children come to our country and they are coordinating their attack on us with cellular technology!

And there is nothing we can do about it.

Or is there?

Maybe we should seal the border and shoot a few of them. Let the world see a handful of children dangling on the wire being picked over by the vultures. Just think how powerful of an image it would be if the world had the opportunity to see a pile of dead illegal immigrant children set on fire at the border.

Pretty disturbing image isn’t it? You are probably pissed off at me for even thinking it let alone publishing it on my little Blog.

And that’s exactly what I want you to think and feel.

The point is, social media is feeding this swarm. Our technology has partially caused this problem. Maybe we should use it to our advantage for once?

We need to develop  a secret program (our government loves secret programs) that creates a few videos showing the above scenes. They get leaked to the news media in this country and around the world. The videos go “viral” and the word gets out that ranchers and land owners on the border are committing terrible atrocities on these children and the United States government is not able, or willing, to stop them.

Maybe if this country was a little less attractive these children and their parents, would think twice about sending their children on a journey on foot through Mexico to get here.

If special effects and Hollywood can make us believe in extra-terrestrials, transformers and Zombies, Why can't we fake a few horrific inhumane videos?

Hell I don’t even like to go to Mexico on vacation anymore let alone walk the length of the country barefoot,

with an iPhone.

Sunday, June 15, 2014

The Answer Part 1.

I am tired of hearing about our military being under funded and all the problems we have with injured veterans returning home from battle. I am not a hippie liberal communist or anti-American in any way shape or form. I just think we are addressing our military issues incorrectly.

We have what, a half a million armed soldiers in various spots around the world? Many millions more of civilian employees supporting them. They have trillions of dollars of weapons and hardware that they use to threaten and scare the shit out of our enemies with. Sometimes they are called upon to use these toys to kill bad guys.

The problem lies in the fact we are a caring, Christian faith based nation. When someone get’s their leg blown off in battle, we do everything humanly possible to save them and try to make their lives normal again. Sometimes we end up spending millions of dollars on a person who barely graduated high school and joined the military because it was a better job then delivering pizzas for a living. (Yes I have made pizzas for a living before so I can speak about that)

Our enemies couldn’t care less. Their advantage on the battlefield is clear. They don’t care about human life. To them, a fallen soldier is just a liability. Some are of the belief that they will be rewarded in an afterlife for dying in battle. They even use suicide bombers to achieve their objectives. They also routinely attack non-combatant civilians. How much have you heard about the Wounded Warriors Fund in an Arabic nation? Any VA for fallen terrorists? Their objective comes first and at all costs.

That’s why we are losing the war on terror on all fronts.

We need to change. We need to be more barbaric than our enemies. This is the only way they will fear us and leave us the hell alone.

We need to have an all convict army. Take our vermin and the worst of the worst criminals we have locked up in our prisons and run them through military style training. Let them be our front lines. Cannon fodder if you will. If they survive their sentence as a soldier they will have been taught a skill and be better rehabilitated than if they just did their time lifting weights and getting three squares in prison while doing drugs and mastering the art of sodomy.

If on the battle field they get shot, too bad. Why should we endanger the lives of others to save them? This sends two messages. To our own guys, you better perform like bloodthirsty killers and to our enemies, hey these guys mean business.

If you really get out of high school and want to join the military without having to go to prison first, you get trained to be an officer/troop guard. You lead your squad and if they turn to run or try to escape you shoot them. Went to college? Have a degree and still want the military life? No sweat. You can fly a jet fighter. The skilled jobs will still be there and those that are qualified will still be able to play with the billion dollar toys. You get to drive the aircraft carrier. The criminals swab the deck and clean the heads. Your care and treatment after your service is merit based. You went in as a volunteer and drove a tank, you get VA care afterwards. You were a drafted/convicted felon offered a chance at redemption, you get to become a productive citizen again. You are on your own medically.

This plan not only reduces the prison population and lowers the cost of incarceration, but it will also serve as a crime deterrent. Do the crime, do the time takes on a whole new meaning. We would also save money by leaving our fallen behind. No more million dollar artificial limbs for people who dodged pizza making and drove their truck through a minefield. The rapist murderer from the inner city street gang who we now have driving the truck becomes part of the local scenery forever.

The money we save by closing prisons, deterring crime and not having to support future casualties could go a long way towards fixing our financial problems as well.

I am not suggesting that we stop caring for those who are already in the system. Our returning warriors are owed a debt and we must make sure they are cared for and repaid. We just can’t afford to keep doing this forever. It’s time for a radical and pragmatic solution to be implemented.

Saturday, May 17, 2014

Do you have any idea?

What the hell you are talking about? I mean really, do you just pick a nice sounding cause out of the air and become an expert on it overnight? It may sound practical, good and politically correct to support something, but shouldn’t you even spend 5 minutes learning about an issue before you go spouting off on the internet and potentially offending millions of people, not to mention exposing your complete ignorance to the world?

My friend list on Facebook is pretty slim. I keep friends who I like, keep in touch with or have similar  beliefs with. I constantly add and purge my friends list according to some pretty strict criteria.

Imagine my horror when someone I once put on my friends list came out with this stupid line about how we humans should stop product testing and clinical trials on animals. I am still so flabbergasted that I am having a hard time typing this let alone breathing.

No Lisa, I won’t mention your name as I am now terribly ashamed to admit I even know you.

The sad part is, this ignorant and foolish belief gets seen by potentially millions of people all around the world and without any research or intellectual backing a movement is born. Soon political pressure develops and vital life saving procedures and products are abandoned. I still get questions from some people about my Cardiac Stem Cell trial. My stem cells did not get harvested from aborted fetuses. They came from MY OWN bone marrow and white blood cells. They were injected into MY OWN left ventricular wall muscle tissue. The result? I have grown new arteries on my heart allowing me to live and blog for a few more years. My wifey is kind of happy with this outcome.

Guess what? This procedure was first tested on animals. So was the insulin I have to take every day to stay alive. I am sure all the medicine I take was once tested on animals. Know anyone with cancer who survived? How about a heart attack? Pneumonia or another ailment that was treated with antibiotics? Ever heard of or used used Johnson’s No More Tears Baby Shampoo? Do you think they tied down a bunch of human babies and squirted that shit into their pried open eyes? Of course not. They did it to lab rats and maybe some monkeys. Lab animals that were conceived and raised for that purpose. Just how else do you think they should have done it?

One of my Facebook friends started mouthing off about animal testing of products and procedures a few minutes ago and you have her to thank for this tirade. I simply go berserk when I hear people who have no knowledge of a subject start pontificating about it in public. Firstly, it makes them look stupid and secondly it embarrasses me for having to admit they are/were my friend. You can also be assured I won’t defend their stupidity in the name of friendship either. You may have a right to express your opinion, you may have the ability to reply “To each his Own Chuck” and if you want to tattoo “I am a complete fucking moron who will believe anything I hear or am told” across your forehead, that’s your right as well. And I support it. Hell, I encourage it. Maybe I would have had a heads up before I made/considered you my friend.

Maybe you were a normal thinking adult who was intelligent and enlightened until you ate something that wasn’t tested on animals throughly and then gave you the mind and thought processes of a protozoan. At least no mice were harmed in your intellectual de-evolution. That would have been a shame.

This one I will just unfriend. I see her maybe once a year but have to suffer through her hippy tree hugging stupid rants  at least 10 times a day when she posts her dumb shit deJour on Facebook where it shows up on my news feed.

The problem is this: Her uninformed stupid shit will still be seen by hundreds of people as she is one of those who friends anyone who will listen to her drivel. By the end of the day her dribbling shit of an opinion could be seen by hundreds of thousands of simpletons like her on Facebook and possibly effect real change in the world.

To much public policy and legal change is made by uninformed idiots who can control the masses by saying feel good shit that makes no sense whatsoever.

Please people, for the sake of my blood pressure. Think before you open your mouths and embarrass yourselves and me in public. And for heavens sake, think about what you post on the internet. If you haven’t researched it or are just parroting what someone else says because it makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, just keep it to yourself.

At least when Al Gore says stupid shit he knows nothing about in public he does it to make a buck.

Stupidity without even profit as a motive is beyond my comprehension and undeserving of my time.

Wednesday, February 12, 2014

Twitter Storm……

Federal and state authorities in Atlanta and all across the southeast are today bracing for a severe outbreak of dumbshittery.

It seems that for the first time in the history of the planet there will be an ice storm in Atlanta. It's time to just close up shop and start constructing coffins. You better go home and settle your accounts with your Lord and lay down and wait for the Grim Reaper to come for you. The city has been put on "High Alert" for the possibility of 3/4 of an inch of ice to coat trees and power lines. Traffic will be snarled, flights will be cancelled, schools will be closed, dogs and cats will be sleeping in the same rooms….

Please excuse me here for a moment,

What's the big deal?

It has snowed in Atlanta before, They have had ice in Atlanta before. Flights get cancelled in and out of Atlanta all the time, I know. I have been stuck there three times in my life by spring thunderstorms and once I was trapped by snow in the Wyndham hotel. This happens EVERY YEAR or at least every few years.  It's not a catastrophe. It's normal.

I can remember as a kid in growing up in Connecticut, times when we had a couple of FEET of snow overnight and the schools were closed. Dad had to use the snowblower to clean the driveway to get to work. He used to get up at 5:00 in the morning so he could get to work on time. He had snow tires on the cars and a couple hundred pounds of sand in the trunk for better traction. We had an extra fridge in the basement that was full of food and plenty of winter supplies stocked up. The generator was gassed up and waiting for the power to go out. Sometimes for days at a time. We just KNEW that the weather was going to suck in the winter back then. We were prepared for it. Why isn't anyone smart enough to do that now?

What isn't normal is the reaction by the idiots in the news media who have nothing better to do than stir up trouble in order to keep the advertising dollars flowing in. You can now get severe weather reports sent to you automatically by text and twitter messages. This is just in case you didn't know the sky was falling, or Godzilla was coming,  from listening to the radio or TV news.

Why does it seem that the more technology we acquire, the stupider we become? Weather forecasts still miss the mark sometimes but every fool has an iPhone. All you have to do is get a free weather app and you will see that the weather is going to be shitty today. Should you go to work knowing there is going to be ice on the road tonight? Should you wear a coat and maybe have some winter supplies in your car like an ice scraper or brush to get the crap off your windows. Maybe snow chains are in order?

Or maybe, just maybe you should keep your stupid ass home. If you get stranded or wreck your car in "The Storm of the Century" tonight you are going to miss a couple days work anyway. Are you that damn important that the weather and world should stop for you? Should your dumbassery trump common sense? Do you have ANY common sense at all?

You are smart enough to have the latest $500.00 cell phone but you still go out in the snow and ice and not expect to get stuck or at the very least delayed?

Or should you just flush your smartphone down the toilet and try not to act like such an unprepared jerk in the first place?

Monday, January 27, 2014

One of our SUBS is missing?

We have Lost A Sub?

More like a whole fleet of Subs.

What the hell are you blabbing about now Chuckie? Have you gone off the deep end again?

Yes, Yes I have.

You see, your local Subway sandwich shop is going to be very different pretty soon. It's probably going to be subtle at first. It will resemble the take over of the automobile, banking and healthcare industries by our trustworthy government.

You see, Subway will soon be displaying Michelle Obama's picture in their restaurants. She promotes a "healthy diet" and therefore it seemed like a good idea to Subway's management hacks to have her as a spokesperson. So soon when you are going in for a nice lunch you will get to see her nasty mug staring down at you while you eat.

Boycotts are being organized already and some local franchises will be hurt. Wouldn't it suck to be the businessman who invested tens of thousands of dollars into opening and running a Subway store only to have the corporate office require you to put Mrs. Obama's picture in your store? Especially when you know that it will hurt your sales and reputation. With so many other Sub shops opening these days it would suck to have your own parent company hang you out to dry.

Don't get me wrong here, I LIKE Subway. They make a pretty good sandwich and they are in places that are convenient to what I like to do. Sure, some of their national advertising campaigns suck, but, they do make a quality product and employ a lot of people who need a good first job. I just will now start  looking elsewhere for my sandwich needs.

And to take things to the extreme (like I am sometimes prone to doing) Will it stop with her sponsorship? Is this a move against the fast food industry by our government to eventually control what you eat? Don't think it can happen? That's what they said about the auto industry. Remember when Chrysler was an American company? Sure young boys didn't have a poster of a Passat on their wall growing up, but NOBODY had a graphic of a Fiat on their wall either!

The point is, New York City already has laws about soft drink size and other silly nutritional regulations that impinge your choices as an American. Some high schools only have vending machines with "healthy" products in them. Don't even get me started on those fools in California who have more silly laws on the books than you can imagine.

Will the IRS soon be in control of the nutritional laws and what you chose to eat in coming years?

No one thought the IRS would be in charge of your health insurance either.

Remember where you heard it first.

Bon Appetit!

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

I Wonder Why...

Why is it that there are no women in the Viagra television commercials?

Every other advertisement on TV for "Boner Pills" has above average to outrageously beautiful women in them. Sure at the end of the Cialis ads the amorous couple are in separate bathtubs, but the point is clear. Take these pills and get laid by a sexy female.

Who is Viagra advertising to?

Just wondering.

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Public Service Segment....

For those of you with Direct TV satellite television service I offer the following summary.

You missed nothing on the Weather Channel today. Zip, Nada, Zilch, Zero.

The simple fact is the Weather Channel has been in decline for the last 10 years. I doubt they will be around five years from now anyway. Direct TV is just the first wound in a big, dumb, clueless animal.

Sure they have some hot chicks in tight sweaters as on camera meteorologists (OCMs) but that's about it. They are so busy showing stupid documentaries and lousy original programming that you can't seem to get a forecast out of them anymore. Every segment is sponsored by a publicity hungry company. "Weather and your Athletes Foot" sponsored by Desenex. Today's Humidity Index sponsored by Vagisil. I also have to mention my Dad's pet peeve where the OCM's all are right handed so they stand in front of the east coast and point at the map with their right hands. So where we live is covered by their borrowed clothes.

Of course it all comes down to money. The Weather Channel wants to charge Direct TV more money to carry it's programming. Direct TV said no. And I don't blame them one bit. I haven't watched the Weather Channel in the last two years. Even during Hurricane Season I can get faster and clearer information off of the internet from When I go to the National Weather Services web page I get the information I require instantly. Even the local amateurs do a better job nowadays. I don't have to wait for some stupid program like "Prospectors" or "Highway Through Hell". "Freaks of Nature" is another gem that they feel we would want to watch and why in God's name would anyone watch "Breaking Ice"? What kind of crap is that?

The most disturbing thing is that they are actually arguing that their removal from Direct TV could cost lives and threaten property. My Response?


Maybe a few years ago that argument may have held some water. Not anymore. Even during Hurricane season with active storms approaching populated areas they show their lousy original programing. Some times they even skip their "Tropical Update" segment in favor of whatever commercial filled nonsense they are spewing at the time.

As a kid, I used to watch Aviation Weather everyday with my dad on PBS. It was all weather. Barometric pressure, fronts and severe weather with no fluff and no filler. Just two boring people giving accurate and helpful weather information. When the Weather Channel first came on line I was there and the coverage was really good. The WEATHER was the star. I had no idea who the faces were that delivered it. I got the data I wanted and none of the silly banter between nobodies. But now it's changed. The stars must have unionized or done something to get more face time and have to provide less content. Jim Cantore used to be informative and quite helpful. I suppose his humility went the way of his hair. Now he is a celebrity and hosts a half dozen time wasting segments a week. And I would rather wake up with a wet smelly stray dog than "Wake up with Al".

I have Dish TV now and if they lost the Weather Channel I wouldn't even know it. They are not even on my favorites list. In fact I don't know anyone who really watches them anymore.

Which is typical of American television these days.

Which is a terrible shame.

Monday, January 6, 2014

Human Achievement…..

As a child of the 60's I have seen some amazing things so far in my brief stay on this planet.

Color TV, push button phones, cell phones, computers, satellite TV, the list goes on and on. My grandmother used to tell me how excited they were when they saw airplanes flying overhead. They remembered when TV was first available in black & white. In college we used to listen to old time radio shows late at night with the lights off. Lamont Cranston used to scare me silly.

This got me to thinking…..What has been the greatest human achievement of all time?

I first started by thinking that this would be a generational question. Some dipshit kid born in the 90s might say the Playstation 4 is the answer. My generation may say putting a man on the Moon. Organized religion has been mentioned as man's finest invention. I guess the fact that probably half the wars and a good deal of all the untimely human deaths since humanity has began could be blamed on religion. So that can't be it.

A good candidate might be the controversial ability of our species to genetically modify food crops to alleviate starvation. Regardless of a few uninformed idiotic activists, this might be the one I would rank highest. The development of fertilizer and maybe insecticides could be a close second. The discovery of yeast fermentation to brew beer would be a good candidate as well. The Bikini? That's gotta rank up there also.

I suppose we will never know as long as we are stuck in our current frame of reference. We can look backwards in time and see events and inventions that have changed mankind's future for those who were alive then. This requires us to move forward in time to extrapolate what we do now, or have done, that will be the defining moment in our collective human history.

According to Pierre Boulle, in 700,000 (seven hundred thousand) years, when the dominant species on Earth will be the Ape and humans will be hunted as crop destroying pests, we may be able to get an idea.

Buried deep inside a cave, high on a cliff face over looking the ocean lies the answer. It will be as shocking to you as the end of the iconic movie I am stealing this idea from.

Yes ladies and gentlemen, boys and girls, fearless readers of all ages. The greatest achievement of Homo sapiens sapiens is…..

Reynolds Crock Pot Liners.

And here you assumed Deep Thought was the only one who could answer the really big questions.

Your Welcome.

Friday, January 3, 2014

I Don't Buy It…….

Has anyone noticed that commercials on the television are now getting dumber, racier and even more disgusting by the minute?

First we had the last election. All of those nasty attack ads have opened the floodgates for just about anything to be shown between and during our favorite programs.

One of the stupidest ads is the homeless looking, long haired, moth eaten fellow trying to sell us a phone plan from Vonage where we can get cheap telephone long distance by using our broadband internet connection as our phone service. They even say that there is no computer required. Do you know anyone with broadband computer access to their house without a computer? Who is this flea bitten dirtball who dresses so poorly and why should we listen to him? Crazy Generous? I call this crazy stupid.

How about all the gym and spa commercials? They have the same problem as all of the Caribbean resort commercials. There are no fat or ugly people in them. I would love to go to Sandals or Club Med. We can afford it too. I just would be uncomfortable around all those "Beautiful People" Show a few average folks, a couple of older folks or a few fatties and just maybe I wouldn't be so intimidated.

Those commercials are just annoying and insulting. The ones I object to the most are the downright disgusting and nauseating ones.

Order a months supply of catheters for free from Liberty Medical. The last thing I want  to see or even think about is some old person sitting on the crapper shoving a plastic tube up their urethra so they can pee into a bag. I feel sorry for these people I really do, I just don't want to see one of those nasty damn things on my 60" TV while I am eating spaghetti.

And even worse, one of the TV stations here is advertising for a "Dick Doctor". He offers a solution for sufferers of Erectile Dysfunction on the local NBC affiliate. He stands there in a white lab coat telling you he has a treatment that he guarantees results while you are there in his office. So not only do I get to picture standing there in a doctors office naked trying to sport some wood, I get to wonder how he does it. Surely he doesn't have a team of Victoria's Secret nurses there to help you raise your periscope.

Actually, what he is peddling a drug called Muse. It's been around for a while. It's an intra-penile suppository that you shove down Mr. Happy and then you rub him between your hands until you get the desired effect. If you don't like that method, you can take the injections. You heard me right. You finally have scored a date with the hottest, sexiest lady you have ever seen. Dinner, an expensive show, dancing, and then back to your place for an erotic and romantic encounter. "Be there in a second darling. I just have to give myself an injection into the base of my penis." You hear a scream, the door slams and you are standing there naked, towel holder standing straight out, wondering what you are going to do for the next 4 hours. Besides the obvious of course.

This physician pays for television advertisement time during the six o'clock news (6:00) on the NBC network in a city of over a million people. It just makes me want to barf every time I see it.

You would think that such a hypersensitive society like ours would at least take a stand against some of these disgusting and offensive commercials.

I just quit buying products whose commercials offend me. I know it's not going to change anything, but at least my conscious is clear.